The Auctioneer - Leroy VanDyke
Now there was a boy in Arkansas
And he wouldn't listen to his ma
When she told him that he ought to go to school
He'd sneak away in the afternoon
And he'd take a little walk
And pretty soon you'd find him
At the local auction barn
He'd stand and listen carefully
Then pretty soon he began to see
How the auctioneer could talk so rapidly
He said  "Oh my  it's do or die
I've got to learn that auction cry
Gotta make my mark and be an auctioneer"
25 dollar  30 now  30 dollar  30 dollar
30 dollar  30 dollar  give me a hollar  30 dollar
Who will bid it at a 35 dollar bid
35 dollar  35  35  make it 35 and a 35
Make it 35 and a 35
Who will bid it at a 35 dollar bid
Now time went on and he didn't rest
And everybody saw that he didn't jest
He practiced calling bids every night and day
His daddy'd find him out behind the barn
He'd be workin' up an awful storm
He tried to imitate the auctioneer
And dad said  "Son  we can't stand
To have a mediocre man
Selling things at auction using our good name
Now I'll send you off to the auction school
And then you'll be nobody's fool
And you can take your place among the best"
35 dollar  40 now  40 dollar  40 dollar
40 dollar  40 dollar  give me a hollar  40 dollar
Who will bid it at at a 40 dollar bid
40 dollar  45  45  will you make it 45
Give me 45 and a 45
Who will bid it at a 45 dollar bid
From that boy that went to school
There grew a man who played it cool
And he came home a full-fledged auctioneer
See the people come from miles around
What to hear him make that rhythmic sound
That filled their hearts with such a happy cheer
Then his fame reached out from shore to shore
And he had all that he could do and more
He had to buy a plane to get around
Well  he was the best in all the land
And everybody gave that sucker a hand
And he was the best hilly billy auctioneer
45 dollar  50 now  50 dollar  50 dollar
50 dollar  50 dollar  give me a hollar  50 dollar
Who will bid it at a 50 dollar bill
50 dollar  55  55  make it 55 and a 55
Make it 55
And I sold that hog for a 50 dollar bid