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Ya, you met him on a blind date
Think he the one 'cause he a safe bet
Or he might have a 401k
But he ain't out here cashing all these Mike's Hard checks, ah yes
I can't be the guy to fix your plumming
But **** it I can pay someone to do it for you
You say your man can't even pass the bar to be a lawyer
And every time he talk about his day I know it bore you
You need somebody that can make your mom proud
I'd rather be the guy that's gonna make you moan loud
Really wanna be a housewife in upstate New York
Five star dinners in the shopping mall food court
Lame-ass, minivan-driving man, purse wearing
Wonder why you on vacation out in Ocean City, Maryland
Or somewhere to send your budget like that
Trust me baby girl I'm just nothing like that
What you don't see, he ain't got nothing on me
And I know it's hard to believe, but I've got all that you need
I know he look better on paper, but that shit overrated
Oh, he look better on paper, but you say reading outdated
Ah, yeah
Skrrt
Okay, cool he's got a degree
Me, I went to school the difference is I lasted a week
He's got a 9-5, me I work a 9-9
AM to the PM means I'm working through my day and my sleep
Downing PCH, you could ride with me 'cause I ain't never pump the breaks
You put him first, I put him last in every single way
He a lame, everybody in his frat look the same
Girl I think you think you need a change
Come and catch a flight, we don't need destinations
And we don't need hesitations, he leaves you home masturbating
When you just need a pipe, you just need to see
Even though I failed, I can tell that we got chemistry, ****
So leave his ass at home
When he calls, when he texts, turn on airplane mode
You wanna stay, or go travel different area codes
I'll be way more lovey, dovey
**** with me and prove your vision's 20-20, ****
What you don't see, he ain't got nothing on me
And I know it's hard to believe, but I've got all that you've need
I know he look better on paper, but that shit overrated
Oh, he look better on paper, but you say reading outdated
Ah, yeah
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