(Anne, spoken)
Hope to see you at our holiday party tonight, Joe!
(Joe, spoken)
Holiday party? God, no!
(Chorus line)
Hark, the herald angels sing
Glory to the newborn king
Peace on earth, and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled
(Verse 1: Joe)
If I'm being honest it was all very harrowing
When the invite came for an evening of caroling
I don't like singing, I'm not much for conversation
And the combo of the two gave me such hesitation
I took a little something just to dull all the edges
Either that or I was certain to be jumping off the ledges
I'm really quite sorry but I'm going to admit it
I'm really so sorry, if I could I would quit it
But the fact of the matter is I did a little cocaine tonight
(Chorus line)
God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
Remember Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day
(Verse 2: Joe)
I'm trying to relax but instead I keep finding
That I'm sweating from my brow and my teeth won't stop grinding
And my mouth is as dry as the sand of the Sahara-y
So I miscalculated and I chugged down a sherry
The whole room is spinning and I want to take a knee
But instead I'll sneak a bump as I hide behind the tree
I'm really very sorry that I can't stop talking
I'm so very sorry for my chirping and my squawking
But the fact of the matter is I did a little cocaine tonight
(Chorus line)
Oh, come all ye faithful
Joyful and trium--
(Verse 3: Joe)
Things started reelin', they kept getting realer
I started running low, so I called up my dealer
Twenty minutes later, the apartment door was buzzin'
When my dealer came in, I said he was my cousin
I didn't think it through, and I realized I'd been reckless
'Cause my dealer is a stealer and he left with a necklace
I truly am regretting that I did a little cocaine tonight!
Oh man, here comes Anne, she's the athlete from 12G
(Bridge: Joe)
She's the knees, of the bees, always making eyes at me
It would seem such a dream if I asked her for a dance
But I just blew a rail and I'm gonna shit my pants!
(Anne & Joe)
Joe: Hey Anne I'm Joe, yes of course you know
Anne: Hey there Joe, yes Joe I know
Joe: I don't know why I'm telling you so
Anne: I was just about to go
Joe: I just got here and grabbed a beer, Are people singing or is it clear?
Anne: I'm partied out without a doubt, when it comes to singing I can do without
Joe: You look stunning, is your nose running? I can get a tissue if it's an issue
Anne: Truth be told I have a cold, with a head like mine there's no denying
If I come clean don't start a scene but in this moonlight you're such a sight
(Together)
That it just feels right to admit I did a little bit of cocaine tonight
(Anne, spoken)
Do you have more?
(Joe, spoken)
I can get some!