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Come in. 进来
I've been waiting for you. 我等很久了
Hi,I just 我只是…
Oh,my God! Monica! 天啊，摩妮卡
Oh,my God!
I'm sorry! I was 抱歉抱歉
I was taking a nap. 我正在睡午觉
Since when do you take naps in that position? 你从何时开始 用那种怪姿势睡觉？
Tell me you were waiting for a guy. Please tell me. 摩妮卡，你是在等男人吧？ 拜托你说是在等男人
Yes,I was. A guy. 没错，我在等男人
From work. 公司同事
I'm seeing a guy from work! 我最近跟同事约会
That cute waiter guy that looks like a nonthreatening Ray Liotta? 那个长得像雷李欧塔亲切版的 帅哥服务生？
That one! 就是他
Give me a second. I'm just going to grab a jacket. 我马上就闪人 我只是回来拿件外套
When I get back, I want every little detail. 等我回来可要告诉我详情
Maybe that's him. 他可能来了
或许…
It's just Joey and Ross. 只是乔伊跟罗斯
Why aren't you at the movie? 你们不是去看电影吗？
Ross was so loud,they threw us out. 对啊，可是罗斯讲电话太吵 才被电影院轰出来
I had to talk loud because the movie was loud! 电影太吵，我当然得大声讲
He's talking to London. 他打电话去伦敦
Did he get in touch with Emily? 为什么？他找到艾蜜莉了？
No,not yet. He's hoping that someone will help him get in touch with her. 还没，但是他打给女方亲戚 希望有人愿意帮他
I don't care if I said some other girl's name,you prissy old twit! 就算我说错名字又如何 你这大惊小怪的笨蛋
Way to suck up to the family! 罗斯，你巴结姻亲真有一套
I'm so glad you're all here. My office finally got wrinkle-free fax paper! 真高兴大家都在 我们公司终于买免皱传真纸了
The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS 本集播出：“好人好事”
Hi,is this Nanny Hopkins? I'm looking for Emily. 请问是霍普金奶妈吗？ 我找艾蜜莉
Waltham. 沃森
Oh,I'm sorry. Is this 0-1-1-4-4-7-4-2... 抱歉，这是011447 4293474267吗？
...9-3-4-7-4-2-6-7?
Oh,it's "4-3," not 4-2. 是43不是42啊
Well,which 4-2? 哪个42？
Don't worry, I had it dry-cleaned. 放心，我送去干洗过了
Vomit tux? 呕吐西装？
Who vomited on? 谁会吐在西装上？
You know what? What you up to,Joe? 乔伊，你为何穿成这样？
They're doing this telethon thing on TV. 我要上马拉式电视节目
And my agent got me a job as cohost! 我的经纪帮我争取当主持人
That's great! 太棒了
A little good deed for PBS, plus some TV exposure. 帮公视做好事 又能增加曝光率
That's the kind of math Joey likes to do. 我乔伊最爱做这种事了
Oh,PBS! 公视啊
-What's wrong with PBS? -What's right with them? 公视哪里不对了？
他们哪里对？
Why don't you like PBS? 菲比，你为何不喜欢公视？
Right after my Mom killed herself, I was in a bad place,personally. 因为我妈自杀之后 我个人非常难过
I thought I'd write to Sesame Street. 所以我想写信给芝麻街 心情应该会好一点
Because they were nice when I was a little kid. 因为我小时候 总觉得他们很亲切
No one ever wrote back. 结果根本没人回信
A lot of those muppets don't have thumbs. 那些布偶根本没有手指
All I got was a lousy key chain,and by that time,I was living in a box. 我只收到一个恶烂钥匙环 拜托，我那时住在纸箱里耶
I didn't have keys! 连钥匙都没有
I'm sorry,Phoebe. 我很遗憾，菲比
I wanted to do a good deed, like you did with the babies. 我只是想做好事 就像你帮忙生小孩
This isn't a good deed. You just want to get on TV. This is selfish. 你才不是做善事 只是想上电视，根本就很自私
What about you having those babies for your brother? 哇… 你帮弟弟生小孩又怎么说？
That's selfish! 自私的不是只有我
What are you talking about? 你胡说什么？
It was a nice thing, but it made you feel good,right? 你的确是帮忙他们 不过自己心情也很好吧？
Yeah,so? 那又如何？
It made you feel good so that makes it selfish. 因为你做善事心情好 也算是自私的一种
Look,there's no unselfish good deeds. Sorry. 世界上根本就没有无私的好事
Yes,there are totally good deeds that are selfless! 明明就有 有很多行善的人都没有私心
May I ask for one example? 请你举出一个例子
Yeah,it's You know,there's 就是有，例如…
No,you may not! 我不想说
Because all people are selfish. 因为所有人都很自私
Are you calling me selfish? 你说我自私？
Are you calling you people? 你难道不是人？
Sorry to burst that bubble,Phoebe, 菲比，很抱歉戳破你的美梦
but selfless good deeds don't exist. 世界上没有无私的善事
You know the deal on Santa Claus? 你也知道圣诞老人吧？
喂
罗斯吗？
Oh,my God! It's Emily! 艾蜜莉，天啊，是艾蜜莉
It's Emily,everyone! 大家不要吵！
I'm only ringing to say stop harassing my relatives. Goodbye. 我打来只是要告诉你 别再骚扰我家人了，再见
You can hang up,but I'll keep calling everyone in England... 等一下，就算你挂断 我也会继续打
...if that's what it takes to get you to talk to me. 如果要打给所有英国人 才能逼你跟我说话 我也办得到
Really? About what? 真的？你想谈什么？
Look,you're my wife. We're married. 你是我太太，我们已经结婚
You know,I love you. 而且我爱你
I really miss you. 我很想你
I miss you too. 我也很想你
At least,I think I do. 至少我认为如此
She's talking. 她肯跟我说话了
万岁
When you said "the deal with Santa," you meant...? 乔伊，你刚刚 为何提到圣诞老人？
That he doesn't exist. 根本没有这号人物
Right. 这样啊
Chandler,have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend? 钱德，你听说 摩妮卡的地下情人了吗？
Yeah,she might have mentioned him. 知道，她…她是提过
So,Mon,when are we going to meet this new,secret waiter man? 我们到底何时 才能认识这个服务生？
I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet. 他很害羞，现在还没准备 认识大家
Yeah,I don't think he's up to it. 我想他还没准备好
I want to meet this guy who's the best *** she ever had. 我不管，我想见他 她说对方床上一级棒
Really? 真的？
That's what you heard? You said that? 她说过？你说过？
I might have. 大概吧
Why is that funny? 这有什么好笑？
Because I'm very happy for him. 因为我很为他高兴
And you! You lucky dog! 你真是走狗运！
She's willing to work on the relationship. 艾蜜莉愿意跟我复合
That's great! 太好了
In London. 她要我去伦敦
She wants me to move to London. 她要我搬到伦敦去
But you live here. 可是你住在这里
You know that. 我这是废话
-What will you do? -I don't know. 你打算怎么办？不知道
-I mean,I can't leave Ben. -You can just video-conference with him. 我不能丢下班 你可以跟他用视讯会议
I'm not ready to have a child. 我还不够格当爸爸
I bet if I talked to Carol and Susan... 只要跟卡萝、苏珊谈谈
...I could convince them to move to London with Ben. 一定能说服她们带班搬到伦敦
I'm sure your ex-wife would be more than happy to move... 想必你前妻一定乐意搬到国外
...so you can patch things up with your new wife. 帮你挽回新太太
It could happen. 不是不可能啊
Ross,we are not moving to London. We already have lives here. 罗斯，我们才不搬到伦敦 我们的生活重心都在这里
...great accents. 口音、
Tea. 茶
They have a queen. 英国还有女王
-So? -She's a woman. 所以呢？她是女人
-Daddy! -Hey! 爸爸
Guess what? We're moving to London! 告诉你，我们要搬到伦敦了
-Who's going to London? -Nobody's going to London. 谁要搬去伦敦？不是我们
Welcome to London,governor. 欢迎莅临伦敦，总督
Right,right. It'll be great because we'll have Big Ben and little Ben... 太棒了，到时就有大笨钟 跟我们小班
...in the same city. 都在伦敦了
Go pack! 赶快去整理行李
See? See,he wants to go. 你们看，他想去
Yeah,we leave all our big decisions to the 3-year-old. 是啊，我们都让三岁小鬼 决定家里大事
Come on,come on. It'll be just like Three's Company... 这就像“三人行”嘛
...only there's a kid and my wife... 只是另外两个 换成一个小孩跟我老婆
How you doing? Welcome. Good to see you. 你好，欢迎，幸会
This'll be your phone. 这就是你的电话
That's great. 真好
No,you answer it and take pledges. 你负责接电话接受捐款
But I'm the host. 我是主持人
Gary Collins is the host. You'll be answering the phone. 盖瑞卡林才是主持人 你负责接电话
You don't seem to understand. I was Dr. Drake Ramoray. 你恐怕搞不清楚状况 我是雷医生
Well,here's your phone,doctor. 你负责这支电话，医生
I can't believe I can't find a selfless good deed. 我竟然找不到一件无私的善行
You know that old guy that lives next to me? 以前我家隔壁有个老头
I snuck over there and raked up the leaves on his front stoop. 我偷溜到他家 帮他打扫前廊的落叶
But he caught me,and he force-fed me cider and cookies. 他捉到我之后 强迫我喝西打、吃饼干
Then I felt wonderful. That old jackass! 可是我却很开心，那个呆子
Maybe Joey's right. Maybe all good deeds are selfish. 或许乔伊说得对 所有好事的出发点都有私心
I will find a selfless good deed. I gave birth to three children... 我一定要找到一件无私的善行 毕竟我才刚生出三个宝宝
...and I won't let them be raised in a world where Joey's right! 不能让他们在 乔伊有理的世界里长大
If you're cooking on the stove... 当然 如果你用炉子烹饪
...that means your new boyfriend is better in bed than Richard? 是否代表你新男友在床上 比理查还厉害？
钱德
I think I'll respect the privacy of my new,secret boyfriend. 我要尊重秘密新男友的隐私
Why? 为什么？
If this guy was me... 如果我是他
and it's me who'd learned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had... 又知道 自己是你碰过最棒的情人
...I'd be like this: 我一定乐歪了
All right,Emily. 艾蜜莉，
As much as I love you... 虽然我很爱你
...I'm sorry,I can't move to London without Ben. 但是我不能丢下班去伦敦
I understand that would be difficult. 我知道这很为难你
Would you consider moving here? You were moving here anyway. 请你考虑搬过来好吗？
Why can't you just do that? 你本来就打算搬来 为何不现在就来呢？
I don't know. It's just 我不知道，只是…
But I know that even though I've been a complete idiot up till now... 我知道自己到目前为止 都蠢头蠢脑
...you have to come here. 但是你还是应该过来
You have to,so we can work this out together. 我们才能继续走下去
All right. 好吧
Did you just say "all right"? 你刚说好？
I did. Now I'm the idiot. 没错，现在换我是白痴
It'll be great! 太棒了
We're going to be like two idiots in love! 我们就像坠入爱河的白痴
There's one thing that really scares me still. 罗斯，有件是还是让我很担心
-Yes,tell me. -You must understand... 你尽管说
...how humiliating it was for me at the altar... 你要知道当天婚礼
...in front of my family and friends. 我在亲朋好友面前有多丢脸
I know. I am so sorry. 我知道，我非常抱歉
And then,after deciding to forgive you... 当我决定原谅你
...seeing you at the airport, catching our plane with her. 却看到你跟她赶着上飞机
Again,very sorry. 这也是我的错
I mean,I can't be in the same room as her. 我根本无法与她共处一室
It drives me mad thinking of you being in the same room as her. 我光想到你跟她共处一室 就快气坏了
Emily,there is nothing between Rachel and me. 艾蜜莉，我跟瑞秋根本没什么
I love you. 我爱的是你
All right. 好吧
I'll come to New York, and we'll try to make this work. 我去纽约，我们再试试看
That's so great! 太好了
As long as you don't see Rachel anymore. 只要你答应不再见瑞秋
I asked Emily if she would come to New York. 我就问艾蜜莉愿不愿意来纽约
And she said yes. 她答应了
Great! 太好了 赞
不不不
Only if I promise never to see Rachel again. 条件是我不准再见瑞秋
What? You can't 为什么？ 什么？不成啦
What did you say? 你怎么说？
I'd think about it. How am l supposed to make this decision? 我说在考虑 我到底该怎么决定？
I'm actually asking you! 我这是在问你们
That's true! 对 也是
You can't just cut Rachel out of your life! 你跟瑞秋从中学就认识 不能说不见就不见
That's true! 你说得也对 的确不行
Thanks for the help. Problem solved! 谢谢你们的帮忙 问题一点也没解决
喂 摩妮卡
When will you be on TV? 乔伊，我们看了一整天电视 你到底何时才会出现？
There was kind of a mix-up in my agent's office... 我经纪人搞错了
...but I'm still on TV, and that's good exposure. 反正我上了电视就有曝光率
You're not on TV. 你没上电视啊
How about now? 好吧，现在呢？
There he is! 有了，看到他了
Hello,New York! 嗨，纽约
Maybe just put the whole duck in there. Who cares? 问题是这里有整支鸭 不过管他的
Now I got the legs. 我先处理鸭腿
How many times have I told you to never watch the cooking channel? 我说过多少次 不准看烹饪频道
I need that broiling pan that Joey borrowed. 我来要回乔伊上次借的烤盘
That was yours? 那是你的？
We used it when the duck was throwing up caterpillars. 我们上次用来 盛小鸭吐出来的虫子
Williams-Sonoma, fall catalog,page 27. “威廉索诺玛”秋季刊27页
Expect it in 4 to 6 weeks. 4到6周后送货到家
Joey's at the telethon for the rest of the day. 乔伊今天一整天都不在
We have the place to ourselves. 整个家里就只有我们两个
Yeah,so? 那又如何？
Maybe you'd want to book some time with "the best you've ever had." 或许你想跟最佳情人 预约时间约会
You know what,champ?
I think I'll pass. 我自愿放弃
为什么？
What's your point? 什么意思？
With all the stupid gloating, would you want to sleep with you? 瞧你一副得意洋洋的蠢相 换作是你，还会有性趣吗？
Well,I think I'd be a little out of my league, but I'd give it a shot. 或许有点困难，不过我会努力
PBS Telethon. 公视电视募捐
I just wanted to let you know that I found a selfless good deed. 乔伊，告诉你 我找到无私的善行了
I went down to the park and I let a bee sting me. 我刚去公园让蜜蜂叮我
What good is that going to do? 什么？这对谁有好处？
It helps the bee look tough in front of his bee friends. 这支蜜蜂在同伴面前 脸上有光
The bee is happy, and I am definitely not. 蜜蜂很开心，我却很痛
You know,the bee probably died after he stung you. 蜜蜂叮了你就死了
Damn it! 可恶
Back on in 30 seconds,people! 各位，30秒后开始录影
Excuse me, would you mind switching with me? 抱歉，可以跟你换位子吗？
No way. I'm in the shot,man. 甭想，我刚好在镜头里
-You've been here all day! -I'm taking pledges. 拜托，你已经佔这位子一天了
我在接受捐款，别吵我！
And we're on three,two.... 倒数计时3、2、1
If you've been enjoying Cirque du Soleil... 如果各位喜欢“太阳马戏团”
...and you'd like to see more, it's very simple. 以后还想收看同类型节目 方法很简单
All you have to do is call in a pledge... 只要打电话捐款
...and tell one of our volunteers what type of programming you 并告诉我们的义工 阁下喜欢收看哪类型节目
-Quick broiling pan question -Yes,it really does cost that much. 问你一个烤盘的问题好吗？ 价钱就是这么贵
Maybe next time your duck can puke in something from Pottery Barn. 或许你们下次可以考虑 用廉价盘子处理鸭子的呕吐物
That's it. I cannot make this decision. It is too difficult. 够了 我无法做决定 这实在太难了
I leave it entirely up to the gods of fate. 我决定交给命运之神
A Magic 8 Ball? 神奇8号球？
You can't make this decision with a toy! 你开玩笑吧？ 怎么可以用玩具决定命运？
It's not a toy. 这可不是玩具
I don't know what else to do! 我别无选择
I either keep my wife and lose one of my best friends... 不是追回老婆，失去好朋友
...or I get divorced for the second time before I'm 30. 就是留下朋友 在30岁前离婚两次
If anyone else has a better suggestion,let's hear it. 要是有人有更好的建议 现在就说出来
Because I got nothing! Don't be shy. 否则我真的没有办法！ 大家别害羞
Any suggestion will do. 各种建议都可以
Okay,then. 好吧
Here we go. 开始了
Magic 8 Ball... 神奇8号球
"Ask Again Later." 待会再问
Later is not good enough! 这个答案不够好
"Ask Again Later." 待会再问
What the hell? 搞屁啊
This is broken! It is broken! 这东西坏掉了
Let me see. 我来看看
Will Chandler have *** tonight? 钱德今晚会跟女人上床吗？
Seems like it works to me. 我倒觉得没坏掉
Okay,one more time. 好，再来一次
Should I never see Rachel again? 我是否不该再见瑞秋了？
Magic 8 Ball! What did you ask? 神奇8号球！你问什么？
Does...
...Rachel get to pick the movie that we're all going to see tonight? 今晚要看的电影 可以交由瑞秋决定吗？
Excellent. What's the answer? 很好，答案是什么？
Looks like Stella's gonna get her groove back tonight! 看来老牛今晚吃得到嫩草了
PBS Telethon. 公视电视募款
Hi,Joey. 嗨，乔伊
Hey,Phoebe. 嗨，菲比
I'd like to make a pledge. 我要捐钱
I would like to donate $200. 我想捐200元
Two hundred dollars? 200元？你确定？
You sure? After what Sesame Street did to you? “芝麻街”可是伤你不浅
...to lots of kids whose moms didn't kill themselves. 不过我也知道 很多妈妈没自杀的小孩很爱看
So there! A selfless good deed. 你看，这就是无私的善行
No,it sucks! I was saving up to buy a hamster. 难过死了 我本想用那笔钱买支黄金鼠
A hamster? Those things are,like,$10. 黄金鼠？那种宠物 10元就买得到
Not the one I had my eye on. 我喜欢那支可没那么便宜
It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total. 看来今年的募款 已经超过去年总额
Thank you! 谢谢各位
And the pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers. 打破纪录的捐款是由 我们的义工募得
Oh,boy! And may I say, one of our sharpest dressed volunteers. 而且这位还穿得很体面
Mr. Joseph Tribbiani! 这位就是乔伊崔比亚尼
Oh,look! 看呀
Joey's on TV! 乔伊上电视了
Isn't that great? 太棒了
My pledge got Joey on TV! That makes me feel so 我的捐款让乔伊上了电视
Oh,no! 这真是让我…糟糕
Look... 或许
...I got carried away before, but there's something you got to know. 我先前太得意了 不过有件事要告诉你
If I'm the best,it's only because you made me the best. 如果我表现得很好也是因为你
Keep talking. 说下去
I was nothing before you. 跟你在一起之前 我根本表现平平
Call the other girls and ask. 你可以打去问我以前那些女友
...oh,my God! 我…的…天…啊
-Really? -Oh,my God! 真的？ 天…啊
I understand if you never want to sleep with me again. 如果你不想再跟我上床 我也能体谅
But that would be wrong. 不过这决定就不对了
We're too good. 我们太厉害了
We owe it to ***! 不上床实在太可惜
If we owe it! 如果真是这样…
Oh,my! 天啊
When will Joey be home? 乔伊何时回来？
I was kind of hoping we could do this without him. 我们应该不需要等他
No,no,no! Leave the gloves on. 没关系，手套不用脱
I cleaned the bathroom. 可是我刚在清厕所
Why don't we lose the gloves. 那就脱掉吧 好
All right. Let's show them how it's done. 让大家看看谁才是高手 好
-You know that wasn't part of it? -I know. 这不包括在内 我知道
You ready? We're going to be late. 嗨，你准备好没？ 我们要迟到了
-For what? -For Stella,remember? 迟到什么？看电影啊？你没忘吧？
She's getting her groove back in 20 minutes. 史黛拉都快把到男人了
I totally forgot about that. 我完全忘记了
Can I take a rain check? I'm waiting for a call from Emily. 你不介意我爽约一次吧？ 我正在等艾蜜莉的电话
Sure,I guess. 没关系
I hear you don't have to go to London. 听说你不用去伦敦了，好耶
It's not that easy. There's still a lot of relationship stuff. 事情没那么简单 我们还有很多问题
Like what? 例如？
Just stuff. 就是一些问题
You know,kind of what Emily wants. 艾蜜莉对我有些要求
Talk to me. Maybe I can help. 你可以告诉我 或许我帮得上忙
You can't help. 不行，你帮不上忙
I have to do this without your help. 这件事你帮不上忙
I know you can do that too. I'm just saying if you need to talk.... 我知道你自己办得到 但是如果你想找人谈谈…
嗨
Thanks. 谢了
Whatever it is that Emily wants... 无论艾蜜莉有何要求
...just give it to her. 你答应就是了
The bottom line is that you love her. 最重要的是你爱她
Fix whatever she wants fixed. 她怎么要求，你就怎么做
Just do it. 答应就对了
You're going to have to try. You'll hate yourself if you don't. 你总得试试看 不试试以后一定会后悔
Come on,answer it! 快接电话啊，我都快被逼疯了
Hi,sweetie. 喂，亲爱的
Good. 我很好
Yes,I've been thinking... 我考虑过
...about that thing you wanted me to do. 你的要求
I can do it. 我办得到
Will you come to New York? 你愿意来纽约吗？
-Never done that before. -Nope. 以前没试过这招 我也没
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