Stagger Lee

It was back in '32 when times were hard

He had a Colt .45 and a deck of cards

Stagger Lee

He wore rat-drawn shoes and an old stetson hat

Had a '28 Ford, had payments on that

Stagger Lee

His woman threw him out in the ice and snow

And told him, "Never ever come back no more"

Stagger Lee

So he walked through the rain and he walked through the mud

Till he came to a place called The Bucket Of Blood

Stagger Lee

He said "Mr Motherf**ker, you know who I am"

The barkeeper said, "No, and I don't give a good goddamn"

To Stagger Lee

He said, "Well bartender, it's plain to see

I'm that bad motherf**ker called Stagger Lee"

Mr. Stagger Lee

Barkeep said, "Yeah, I've heard your name down the way

And I kick motherf**king asses like you every day"

Mr Stagger Lee

Well those were the last words that the barkeep said

'Cause Stag put four holes in his motherf**king head

Just then in came a broad called Nellie Brown

Was known to make more money than any b**ch in town

She struts across the bar, hitching up her skirt

Over to Stagger Lee, she starts to flirt

With Stagger Lee

She saw the barkeep, said, "O God, he can't be dead!"

Stag said, "Well, just count the holes in the motherf**ker's head"

She said, "You ain't look like you scored in quite a time.

Why not come to my pad? It won't cost you a dime"

Mr. Stagger Lee

"But there's something I have to say before you begin

You'll have to be gone before my man Billy Dilly comes in,

Mr. Stagger Lee"

"I'll stay here till Billy comes in, till time comes to pass

And furthermore I'll f**k Billy in his motherf**king a**"

Said Stagger Lee

"I'm a bad motherf**ker, don't you know

And I'll crawl over fifty good pussies just to get one fat boy's asshole"

Said Stagger Lee

Just then Billy Dilly rolls in and he says, "You must be

That bad motherf**ker called Stagger Lee"

Stagger Lee

"Yeah, I'm Stagger Lee and you better get down on your knees

And suck my dick, because If you don't you're gonna be dead"

Said Stagger Lee

Billy dropped down and slobbered on his head

And Stag filled him full of lead

Oh yeah.