Crash First (Explicit)

Composed by：Avrey Freeman/Colson Baker/Andrew Migliore

Produced by：No Love for the Middle Child

I fill my lungs with half my worth

And try to go numb so that I can't hurt

'Cause at my highs I'm at my worst

And I can't fly until I crash first

Everyone's seeing me screamin' been that since birth

Everyone's seeing this money I'm blowin' but nobody's seeing the work

Look dad I'm high like you for me the pills don't work

I like diggin' in a bag I like smokin' 'til it hurt

And if my eyes roll back then let the tears come first

Been holdin' those in too long fakin' it like I'm too strong

And when my eyes roll back throw my body in the dam

And them things in my pocket will you hide 'em from my fam?

Will you tell the world I loved hard? Can you make 'em understand

That all of them things I was strugglin' with didn't make me less a man?

And all of the trauma I'm tryin' to bury probably made me who I am

Think growin' up broken was necessary so I could fix my fam

And part of me died on his deathbed holdin' my daddy's hand

Just tell my daughters a father would drown if that means they can swim

I fill my lungs with half my worth

And try to go numb so that I can't hurt

'Cause at my highs I'm at my worst

And I can't fly until I crash first

I know that it takes time I'm comin' to get you

Walk in a straight line I need me a breakthrough

I'm smokin' a grapevine sippin' the grape juice

I'm choppin' a white line it's gettin' harder to face you

Oh God

Yo we 'bout to ayy look

Yo we 'bout to fuck it up

Ayy Kells tell the people man

Ayy bro ayy Kells they act like we don't do this man what? Come on

Yeah take my hands off the wheel I'm speedin'

I said I hate you when I left I didn't mean it

Open wounds from my nose still bleedin'

Only you can clean me up I'm still fiendin'

Cold sweats and these meds can't treat it

No sleep I'ma party through the weekend

Kerosene black smoke I'm breathin'

Somebody save me I've been fallin' off the deep end uh

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck I don't

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck I don't

I couldn't give a fuck no

I never gave a fuck no

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck

Under pressure I don't got control of my aggression

Under the influence I'm 'bout to make a bad impression

On the dresser it's some ammunition and a weapon

And I've been smoking on this shit since I was adolescent

36s I'm tryna get lucky number seven

I wonder if they got a spot for junkies up in Heaven

Leave a message they gon' find my body in the bedroom

And they can listen to this song if they want my confession

Yeah take my hands off the wheel I'm speedin'

I said I hate you when I left I didn't mean it

Open wounds from my nose still bleedin'

Only you can clean me up I'm still fiendin'

Cold sweats and these meds can't treat it

No sleep I'ma party through the weekend

Kerosene black smoke I'm breathin'

Somebody save me I've been fallin' off the deep end no

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck I don't

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck I don't

I couldn't give a fuck no

I never gave a fuck no

All I know is I don't know how to give a fuck

Go go go go

I'm getting closer to death

Go go go go

I'm getting closer

Go go go go

I'm getting closer to death

Go go go go

I'm getting closer