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The Contest - Johnny Depp
I am Adolpho Pirelli
The king of the barbers
The barber of kings
And bongiorno good-day
I blow you a kiss kiss)
And I The so famous pirelli
I wish-a to know-a who
Has-a the nerve-a to say
My elixir is piss
Who says this
I do I'm
Mr Sweeney Todd
Of Fleet Street
I 'ave opened a bottle
Of Pirelli's elixir
And I say to you
That it is nothing
But an arrant fraud
Concocted from piss and ink
And furthermore signor
I've serviced no kings
Yet I wager that I can shave
A cheek with ten times the dexterity
Than any street mountebank
You hear this foolish man
Now please you will see how
You will-s regret this folly
Who's for a free shave
Will beadle Bamford be the Judge
Glad as always to oblige
My friends and neighbors
The fastest smoothest
Shave is the winner
Now signorini signori
We mix-a the lather
But first-a you gather around
Signorini signori
You look in a man who have
Had-a the glory to shave-a
The pope Mr Sweeney whoever
I beg-a your pardon
Will probably say
It was only a cardinal - NOPE
It was-a the pope
To shave-a the face
To cut-a the hair
Require the grace
Require the flair
For if-a you slip
You nick the skin
You clip-a the chin
You rip-a the lip
A bit beyond-a repair
The shave-a the face
Or even a part
Without it-a smart
Require the heart
Not just-a the flash
It take-a panash
It take-a the passion
For the art
To shave-a the face
To trim-a the beard
To make-a the bristle
Clean like a whistle
This is from early infancy
The talent give to me by god
It take-a the skill
It take-a the brains
It take-a the will
To take-a the pains
It take-a the pace
It take-a the grace
The winner is Todd
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